Christmas stories: Kevin and Andy

In this Stories from the Spectrum interview, we spoke to Kevin and Andy.

Christmas can be a wonderful time for many people. ‘Tis the season for gift-giving, celebration and festive cheer. But for many autistic people and their families, the bright lights, busy gatherings, and changes in routine can be very stressful.

This year has been very different, due to the impact of coronavirus. As a charity, we want you to know that you are not alone. Visit our coronavirus pages for tips, advice, and support.

We caught up with YouTuber Kevin Chapman, and his teenage son Andy, who is autistic. They chatted to us about what they like most and least about Christmas, coping with routine changes, and how they’ll be celebrating this year.

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When was Andy diagnosed as autistic and what made you seek a diagnosis for him?

He was diagnosed as a toddler, with concerns raised initially by his health visitor and then his portage [worker, who visits pre-school children who have special educational needs]. He had his diagnosis before he started school.

How does being autistic affect Andy day-to-day?

The biggest impact is the need for routine - Andy always needs to know what he’s doing, when he’s doing it, who with, etc. He thrives when he gets into a regular routine, knowing that certain days and times are for certain things. It allows his anxiety to reduce to a level where he can actually enjoy himself, which he struggles to do on days without routine.

Andy always needs to know what he’s doing, when he’s doing it, who with, etc. He thrives when he gets into a regular routine.

Andy, what kind of things do you enjoy doing?

Trams, churches, train simulator.

How do you both feel about Christmas in general? What do you like the most and least about Christmas?

The whole family enjoys Christmas - we like the lights and the routines of it, and giving and receiving presents is always fun!

The thing Andy likes least is Christmas dinner. He has a very restricted diet, so will just be having his usual fish fingers and waffles while we’re having our big meal. We always try and keep him at the table with us and include him, but he usually doesn’t last long!

Andy, do you like Christmas, and why?

Yes. Presents and Santa.

What is Christmas like at your house?

We like to get stuck into our presents first thing, before we’ve even started on food prep. Then everyone can enjoy their new stuff while we blast out Christmas songs and make dinner. After dinner we’ll usually have a new board game to play.

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What adjustments will you need to make this year due to the coronavirus restrictions? And how do you and Andy feel about these changes?

The big thing is fewer people. Usually, we’d have extended family come around, or we’d go to them - grandparents, aunts and uncles, etc. But this year it’ll just be the five of us. To be honest, Andy will probably prefer it! A typical Christmas Day with lots going on and lots of people can be a bit overwhelming for him. This year will be much more low-key.

Do you have any Christmas tips for autistic people and their families who may find the recent changes difficult?

Over the years, we’ve learned that Christmas doesn’t need to be done all in one day. Family visits can be spread over the week (or however long we’re allowed this year)*, presents don’t need to be opened all at once, and it doesn’t matter if you don’t get everything done that you had planned.

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Is there anything you both think the public could do to help support autistic people and their families during these uncertain times?

Not really. Constantly changing rules and uncertainty is a huge problem for Andy. The only thing that will really help him at the moment is a return to normality - even if it’s a different normal to the one we had before.

The only thing that will really help Andy at the moment is a return to normality - even if it’s a different normal to the one we had before.

*Note, we talked to Kevin and Andy before the additional restrictions following the Government announcement on 19 December.

Christmas tips

With help from autistic people and their families, we've put together some autism-friendly Christmas tips. We hope you find them helpful, and wish you a very happy Christmas and new year!

Read our Christmas tips

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"The only thing that will really help Andy at the moment is a return to normality - even if it’s a different normal to the one we had before."

Kevin Chapman
- on coping with the coronavirus pandemic

Christmas stories: Kevin and Andy

When was Andy diagnosed as autistic and what made you seek a diagnosis for him?

How does being autistic affect Andy day-to-day?

Andy, what kind of things do you enjoy doing?